I’ve set high expectations for myself in life as I’ve always been of the attitude that it’s better to aim high and miss than aim low and hit. And while I still feel that way, it never occurred to me how easy it was to confuse the difference between high and unrealistic expectations.

And I fear I’ve set too many unrealistic expectations.

Part of this is cultural conditioning, especially being a child of the 80s, and being told you can do anything. Just follow your dreams no matter what. This slowly melded with the current milieu of hustle culture and “wanting it enough.”

Social media certainly doesn’t help, especially now with industries built around letting people rent out their homes or private jets specifically to take pictures for their timelines. This makes it genuinely difficult to tell what is real, leaving most of us to be cynical of everything we see and read; especially “advice.”

But the critical factor is the gap between the ideal in my head and what my life situation will actually allow.

A simple example of this, that many of us fall prey to, is timing while travelling. Ideally, we’ll be at our destination in fifteen minutes (which is what we tell whoever we’re meeting), but reality has unforeseen circumstances like… you know… traffic.

To manage expectations then, high and not unrealistic, is simply a matter of understanding the gap between the ideal and reality—then slowly turning the dial.

This is my goal for the year. Nothing more.