The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts.
Marcus Aurelius
Just get this one thing and you’ll be good.
Once we make this particular thing happen, you’ll be happy.
Just do this and you’ll find freedom.
Does it not feel as though we are imprisoned by a society that tells us we’re going to be free and happy, only to never have it happen?
Perhaps our ancient sages had wisdom we badly need again.
I have an unfounded hope in humanity, even as of late. Not sure where it comes from, but my outlook for the future is always positive.
It’s a curse the lessons we needed early in life are always the ones that come to us late… or even too late.
Sure, there’s always something we can do right now, but only if we knew better before, right?
Our collective concern is that humanity is going to learn its lesson a little too late, and while there is something to be said for that, let’s consider where we were a hundred years ago:
We just finished a world war, entered into a great depression and global pandemic.
How much have we learned from then?
How much have we grown?
Despite the media focus, we are not in the same place we’ve always been. We are somewhere much better and the lessons we’re learning too late are the ones our future generation is learning right now.
Also, it’s never too late to start.
Ever.
When we discover that adults are not perfect, that is the end of our childhood. When we forgive them for it, that’s the end of our adolescence.
We often say that adolescence is a phase, but it’s clear not everyone grows out of it.
It’s time to move on.
Every day, I ask my students an ice-breaker question to settle them in for the class. It’s really a memory technique to remind me to do my attendance, but it also provides the extra bonus of making contact with each student, every day.
It’s actually disheartening to know that some students go through their entire day without anybody speaking with them or even saying their name.
One of my favourites is to ask whether they would rather take nothing but cold showers or perpetually always get one less hour of sleep than they need.
It’s really a question of comfort over health and as I enter the middle years of my life, the comforts I’ve worked towards don’t mean anything without my health. It’s a lesson I really wish I could’ve learned at their age, but future forecasting is almost impossible for the majority of humanity—let alone impulsive teenagers.
Given the choice, which is actually one we are presented with almost every day, the choice is simple:
I’ll take the cold showers.
This is a question I ask constantly at the risk of slipping into deep nihilism. Yes, there is a world of problems, but there’s also so much being done across the planet.
My mission statement as a teacher is that students leave with more hope than when they came.
We might be better served by making this our mission statement every day:
What gives you hope for tomorrow?
Long after these social media giants dissipate (and they will), people may recognize sitting on them all day while screaming their ephemeral rage at the latest thing did no good.
It did worse than that, actually.
It just fed other people to also feed their rage into this virtual space.
All to what avail?
Years ago, I would often challenge myself to be distant from the lure of the constant connection. But now, it’s become almost comedic to see the predictable outrage cries attached to any update and staying away is just a simple reminder these spaces has become a very low point of entertainment.
To those that cannot stop engaging, even if it’s with just your attention, it’s time to go do something.
Mad about an issue? Make a phone call to your local representative. Join a group. Go to a meeting.
Wanna see more done? Find an organization nearby and volunteer. See if there’s anything you can do.
Start something.
Go hug a friend.
Go. Do. Something.
Even if it’s simply finding a way to unwind and relax.
My favourite simulation to run with my class is a game called StarPower. Originally developed in 1969, it is a teaching tool that still stands the test of time in showcasing the use and abuse of power.
For the first time in years I got to run the game.
And the results… were exactly the same as before.
My students, even though they are more aware of the issues of today than ever before, fell right into the simulation’s trap. Those who took power in the game attempted to use and abuse it all the way to their supposed victory.
The problem with power is once you get it, and you’re rewarded within a system for the control you can exert once you do, you will do anything and everything to keep it. You don’t wield it for the betterment of others, but for ensuring you maintain it perpetually.
Robert Caro wrote a brilliant biography on Robert Moses all about this (it’s a book I recommend everyone read at some point in their lives) and followed it up with a series on Lyndon B. Johnson. They’re long reads, but illuminate the issue so wonderfully.
The nice thing about the simulation is it has an end-point where participants are stripped of their status and we can debrief about what happened.
Unfortunately, we can’t do that in life.
The closest thing we can do is try to change the system that allows this behaviour in the first place.
It certainly has been some time since I’ve allayed my thoughts to the world. While I would like to say there was something tremendous in the works while I’ve been radio silent on here—I can’t.
I just severely underestimated life.
It feels like a giant disappointment to have this audacious word count goal that I was committed to only to have it derail in a harsh way. While part of me suspected I wouldn’t hit that number this year, I took solace in knowing there would still be great strides in getting there.
In other words, I was trying to write more than I’ve ever had previously.
Instead, the storms of life just kept pushing me one way and another until I had no option but to just hang on until the weather cleared. Given the city I’m in just experienced a storm that shut down our energy grid and left a mess of trees everywhere, this analogy is almost perfect.
Yet, here I am, coming up for air and getting back to it.
I’m not sure what I was thinking at the onset, but I definitely need to temper my expectations a little more. Set them high, but keep them reasonable.
Life continues to happen and I should always remember that for everything I plan.
Saturday mornings are a double-edged sword.
It’s the time when the kids can play, but also when there’s time to get stuff done around the house.
Specifically, clean up from the week.
And this problem is further compounded as the kids make an even bigger mess in their rush to play with everything they have, but also demand attention for someone to play with them… or at least show them what they’re working on.
I often fight with this tension of how I want to use that time, but lately, I’ve felt the last two years have taught me an important lesson:
You can always clean a mess, but you can never get time back.
If the floor is a bit dusty, but the weather is nice—I’m taking them for a bike ride.