Friends should be the most solid foundation of people in our lives.
They are people you get to choose, but they’re also people that get used. It’s easy to take advantage of the people we consider the most important in our lives and yet, it happens. Sometimes, friendships just drift apart and other times they shatter.
Deep, meaningful friendships are a cherished commodity that enables us to keep moving forward. Unfortunately, we’ve entered into a new era where dependability is not always at the forefront. Convenience has taken over and it’s causing hurt to happen.
Calling a friend to spend a few minutes in conversation with them is no longer the norm. Instead, we interpret text messages and dissect every punctuation mark, word and even the timing of the reply – if one comes at all.
(Please do not expect this to be a rant against technology. I am using that example to illustrate a point.)
Some people we consider friends can actually be poisonous to our health and the longer we stay friends with them, the worse our own situation will get. It takes some serious self-reflection to move away. Upon doing so, we will discover better friends just around the corner who will have a positive impact in our lives.
Some people we think are friends turn out to be cadavers who only want to spend time with you to gain something. It could be monetary, but in most instances, it’s to boost their own self-esteem.
A friendship that lasts twenty-plus years doesn’t happen by accident. They happen because both people are willing to put in tremendous amounts of effort to keep it alive. Yes, it’s easier to do this when we are younger and do not have the busyness of daily life to keep us from staying in touch often. That’s why it’s important to work hard at keeping that solid connection.
Life circumstances will also change the friends you keep and the ones who stay. Some friends will come and others will go. There’s not much that can be done in those circumstances, but it’s best not to get frustrated. Appreciate the time you’ve had, anticipate something might come around later, but don’t put all your hopes into it.
The hardest part of friendship is watching the other fall into a horrible situation in which you can do nothing to help. There is nothing you can say, do or contribute to make it any easier for the person. Instead, you must be willing to do something more important:
Tell them you still love them and then sit back.
We all hit low points in our lives. Points where we think this is the worst it’s going to get and there’s nobody around to see us through. It’s at this point, we are blinded by our own despair that we fail to see the love and support of our friends. Remember, if they are solid friends, they will always be there.
And if you’re a solid friend, so will you.