Have you ever tried imitating a comedian, word for word, as if it was your own act, only to have it fall on complacent stares?

Ever wonder why it failed so miserably?

The simple reason is comedy is excruciatingly tough and comedians use an exorbitant amount of subtle techniques that go unnoticed by non-comedians. Also, it’s not your act. It’s their act, with their voice and the circumstances of that audience at that time in that place dictated how they told their jokes.

Comedians spend their first few years trying not to fail. Then they spend a lifetime tweaking, writing, rewriting and practicing every bit they do. Jerry Seinfeld and Larry David literally closed the door to the office and spent their entire time just writing material for Seinfeld. They ignored calls, meetings and everything else just to focus on writing the best show they could.

Starting to get the picture?

Authenticity is not a formula that can be emulated or applied. It’s a living organism with many moving parts that requires your full attention for it to be successful.

The best analogy I can give is a couple who is dating. The most authentic part of the relationship begins when the two begin to see the faults in each other and call them out. This is actually a relief for both because it means they can start being more of who they are without fear of rejection from the other person.

It also means they can take ownership of the relationship, themselves and their responsibilities to each other. Only when that happens does the relationship start to develop depth, where the highs are much higher and the lows are more painful. The two are putting themselves out there for each other.

Words are important, but actions are loud.

Your actions will always dictate whether the words you’re saying are true.